


He wished

by chaoticallyinclined



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Eventually it'll get cute I swear, How Do I Tag, Hurt Adam Parrish, I'll probably edit this a million times, I'm Bad At Titles, I'm so sorry, M/M, Physical Abuse, Poor poor Adam, Right now everything is terrible, Ronan is an asshole but he cares so so much, Verbal Abuse, pynch (eventually), sorry sorry sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:14:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23233801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaoticallyinclined/pseuds/chaoticallyinclined
Summary: Adam dealing with his shitty family and his friends interfering/helping him out. Eventual pynch!
Relationships: Richard Gansey III/Blue Sargent, Ronan Lynch/Adam Parrish
Comments: 17
Kudos: 136





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to comment, etc. I'll try my best to be conscientious to the sensitive nature of some of the subject matter, and tag things appropriately but sorry in advance; my writing doesn't tend to be extremely gory, but please check the tags, stay safe, and just ask if you have questions. I do not own any of the characters, they belong to the lovely Maggie Stiefvater! See the end of chapter notes for TL;DR.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this is the first chapter?? This is the first fic I've posted, and it is not done yet (at all) and probably not very good - sorry again. Not really sure exactly where it's going to go yet, except I don't want it to stay dark and awful for the whole time.
> 
> I actually have more of this written already, but I figured I'd start off by just posting the first bit and see how it goes!

Adam was waiting for Gansey as usual by the fence on the side of the road. He had his ratted uniform on, and nothing else. Adam would rather freeze than be caught wearing anything of his own anywhere near Aglionby Academy. He only relented a few times a year when the absolute cold of winter prevented anyone in Henrietta from leaving their homes without the proper protection. Adam was tired, but he was always tired. He had both worked and studied last night and there had been precious little time left for sleep. He wished he could wash away the circles under his eyes like he washed away the grease from the garage. He wished he didn’t have to see Gansey’s eyes flicker towards him, unsubtly checking, every morning. He wished he had a car. He wished he wished he wished.

Gansey wished Adam would leave. He would have liked nothing better than to never drop Adam off at this spot on the fence ever again. He said none of this as he pulled up to collect him, just unlocked the door and waited for Adam to clamber in.

“Good morning Parrish.”

“Hey Gansey.”

“Hey asshole.” As Adam settled into the passenger side, Ronan, who was unceremoniously stuffed behind him, kicked the back of his seat. He must have done something truly terrible to have been banished from the front of the vehicle, as Ronan was not one to subject himself to injustices on anyone’s behalf. In fact, he rarely subjected himself to regular justices either.

“Slacker.” Adam replied. Monotonal, and ignoring the kick.

“Too early.” Gansey clucked, locking the car doors and pulling away from the shoulder. They drove the rest of the way in silence.

Aglionby was as regal as ever, and the classes were as hard as ever. Adam spent his day writing until his hand cramped and trying to keep the blood from his chapped hands from smudging onto his notes. Gansey found him sitting on the grass outside during the mid-day break, breath fogging under the tree, nose buried in a textbook.

“Come to Monmouth after school.”

“Is it Glendower?”  
“Not today.”

“I have work.”

“After that.”

“I have school.”

“No, you don’t – you have studying.”

“For school.”

“I’ll quiz you.”

“Fine.” Gansey leaned his back against the tree, glancing unsubtly at Adam who pretended not to notice. Adam wasn’t upset with Gansey, no more than usual, just focused. But when Gansey’s eyes finally lifted skywards, he gave himself a brief reprieve from studying to enjoy the moment. Sitting under a tree, his back against the cold bark, the air crisp and scented with possibility.

From a distance, no one would be able to tell the difference between the two Aglionby boys under the tree. The people milling by the entrance couldn’t see how wholly unalike they were. All they would be able to see were two students, two equals. Adam liked that mental image very much and for three whole seconds, he allowed himself to imagine it was true.

He finished his shift at the garage at eight, and Gansey was waiting in the Pig to take him to Monmouth. He spent the evening reciting the answers to their test the next morning and watching the clock. At nine-thirty, he shot a meaningful look at Gansey.

“I have to –“

“I know.”

When Adam got home his Father was standing in the driveway. Gansey pulled the car up to the shoulder and parked, which made Adam weary to the bone.

“I don’t have time to talk Gansey.” Gansey didn’t reply, but his brow furrowed reluctantly. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” Adam said, stepping out of the car. Gansey still didn’t reply, but he let Adam shut the car door and walk down the driveway towards his Father. Adam wished he would drive away, but the headlights stayed dark.

Robert Parrish had his arms crossed and jaw clenched as Adam approached. Adam wasn’t sure if he was supposed to say something or not. He didn’t know if it was safer to stop and stand in front of him or try to slip past into the house. Robert Parrish made a low grunting kind of sound when Adam was finally a few feet away from him, and Adam took this as a cue to stop. He was still listening for the unmistakeable sound of the Pig’s engine, but the offensively orange Camaro stayed silent.

Adam avoided looking directly into his Father’s eyes as he waited. He knew that Robert Parrish was deciding how tonight was going to go. He kept himself still and wary.

“Gone with those rich bastards again huh? What, we aren’t good enough people for you?” Adam felt his stomach drop, just a little.

“Sorry,” he tried “I was studyi-“ He was cut off by the blow, and suddenly he was on the ground, sprawled in the dirt outside his house. He still hadn’t heard the Pig leaving. Silently he prayed that Gansey would go, just go. He stayed down as Robert Parrish’s boots stomped right up next to his face.

“Don’t bring those fuckers back onto my property again,” Robert hissed “if they so much as park their fancy asses near our gate again, you’ll regret it. I don’t need you flaunting these high society lowlifes” – Adam thought privately that _high society lowlife_ was a bit of an oxymoron but stayed silent through the rest of the tirade – “under our noses. You’re not better than us, you ungrateful little shit.” And then he kicked Adam, hard. Adam heard the cracking of bones as the breath went out of him. Robert Parrish kicked him again, and again, and again. When he was done, he stomped back into the house, leaving Adam in the freezing dirt. When he was finally able to force himself up again, Adam looked back to the road. The Pig was gone.

He had no idea how he’d gotten off the ground and into the house, but even lying in his bed aching and exhausted, sleep wouldn’t come. He was quietly grateful that his Father’s first blow had cuffed the side of his head rather than his eye. He would have no visible bruising. His alarm rang quietly at seven am, and Adam wondered belatedly whether his ribs would allow him to rise off the bed. More than that, he had to get dressed.

An hour later, Gansey pulled up to the shoulder. As quickly as he could manage, Adam got stiffly into the passenger’s side. Ronan was inexplicably in the back again.

“Good morning Adam.” Gansey’s eyes were like a billion tiny microscopic needles, and Adam resented it.

“Good morning, Dick.” Gansey blew out a small puff of air from between his lips, and then steered the Pig onto the road. Ronan decided to kick the seat again. Which made Adam yell, which made Gansey swerve and Ronan swear.

“What the _hell_ Parrish!” Ronan’s eyes were more like knives than needles, but Adam had his own knives to contend with. As he clutched at his chest, he had to fight the urge to yell again as they stabbed around inside of him. Gansey started to pull over again, but Adam shook his head fervently.

“Don’t. We’ll be late.”

“Fuck that.” Gansey said adamantly, but he kept driving. Not without protest.

“You’re not going to school.” Ronan wasn’t asking.

“Yes, I am.” Adam wasn’t arguing. Gansey, it seemed, wasn’t participating. Instead he glared out at the road ahead of them like he could set it on fire just by looking.

By the time they reached Aglionby, the aura of Ronan’s sulking was palpable. It permeated the vehicle so thickly that it was a relief to step into the frigid air outside of the Pig. Once he had, Adam started walking towards the building without looking back.

“Adam.” Gansey was looking at him,

“Thanks for the ride.” Adam said, knowing that he was giving the wrong answer. Gansey sighed but broke his gaze to retrieve his bag from the Pig and began walking towards the grandiose building. They were about halfway up to the doors before Adam heard Ronan emerging viciously behind them. To his credit, Gansey only winced slightly when Ronan slammed the Pig’s door shut so forcefully that it rattled.

Now it was Adam’s turn to question Gansey. He raised his eyebrows, head tilted very slightly in the vague direction of the stomping gait behind them. Gansey’s mouth quirked slightly.

“I bet him that he couldn’t find a single pair of matching socks in the squalor of Monmouth. The penalty was if he lost, he had to promise to come to school this week.” Gansey said it like a secret, and Adam reflected inwardly on how bored Ronan must have been to accept such a ridiculous bet.

“What was he going to get if he won?”

“My eternal silence on the matter.” Gansey replied. He waited a moment longer to check that Ronan was out of earshot before he whispered, “I stole all his socks.” At that, Adam’s mouth quirked too.

His day was hell. Every movement made Adam’s face twist and his gut clench. He didn’t trust himself to eat. He sat rigidly at his desk and didn’t raise his hand. He wrote his test and spent his breaks cramming so that he could try and sleep that night. By the end of the day, the edges of his vision were tinged red, and his skin had a grey pallor. Gansey cornered him at his locker. Ronan lurked like a demon behind him.

“Do you have work?” Adam only nodded. “You can’t go like this.” Adam did not even bother acknowledging this with a nod. He finished packing his bag and closed the locker. He had no lock for it, but it didn’t matter because A) no one at Aglionby would want his stuff anyways, and B) he never left anything inside of it (because he didn’t own a lock.)

“It’s fine Gansey.” He started to turn away, too tired to deflect anymore. He heard Gansey sigh heavily behind him, and then Ronan did something cruel. He stalked right up next to Adam and sharply body-checked him into the lockers as he strode past. Adam’s entire side flared with pain as he fell against the clamouring metal. He sank to the floor immediately, hating Ronan, gasping.

“Ronan!” Gansey shouted at Ronan’s retreating figure. Other than a small shake of his shaved head, Ronan gave no indication that he had heard. Adam was trying desperately to get to his feet, face bright red from anger and embarrassment. He slowly clawed his way back up, trying to school his expression into something more livid and less tortured. Other students were staring. Adam could feel it. _Don’t look at me, don’t look at me, don’t look at me._ He was leaning against the wall of lockers, breathing shallowly and trying very hard to look as though nothing that had just happened, had happened.

“Adam.” Gansey was too close to him, concern oozing out of every pore. Adam turned away, his anger rearing,

“Next time don’t park when you drop me off.” He said evenly and then pushed lightly off the wall and walked away.

The garage was worse, by far, than Aglionby. Adam’s boss took one look at him and asked if he needed to go home. Adam tried to seem amiable, like he was just tired, but after hauling himself painfully out from under cars three times, he almost threw up, and much to his chagrin, was sent home. “Jesus boy, you look like death warmed over. I’ll give you extra shifts next week, but you’re not sticking around, and you’re not coming in tomorrow. If I catch you here, you’re done.” Adam tried to feel grateful for this kindness, but a weighty sense of foreboding interfered.

He couldn’t remember how he’d gotten home, but suddenly he was standing inside the dimly lit kitchen and his Father was eating something at the table and his Mother was staring at him from where she hovered near the sink.

“I thought you worked tonight.” Robert Parrish’s voice was gruff as he spooned more soup into his mouth, back turned to Adam. Adam was too surprised by the revelation that his Father remembered his work schedule to realize the threat in the words.

“I was.” He replied, a moment too late, “I was sent home.”

“For what?” His Father still wasn’t looking at him.

“For –“ Adam choked on the words. He knew he couldn’t say why, but he couldn’t say nothing, and his brain felt like it was full of cotton.

“You fired?” Robert’s voice was deadly calm.

“No!” Adam blurted, “I just…wasn’t feeling well.” He finished lamely. “He said he’d give me extra shifts next week.” He was doing a sloppy job of patching the situation, and he knew it.

“You too good to work now? Got your puffed-up new friends paying for everything while your Mother and I sit in this dingy piss-hole all day and night?”

“N-no. I don’t let them pay for anything.” Adam’s breath was fleeing from his lungs like rats on a sinking ship. The hairs on the back of his neck were standing up.

“That so?” Adam waited, breath hitching very slightly, “We both know you’re faking _Adam.”_ His father said Adam like some people said _disgusting_ “Don’t try to play me for a fool. You aren’t sick, you’re a liar and a suck-up, and I won’t be lied to inside my own house.” He stood so fast that Adam had no time at all to prepare himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First chapter is pretty short, might actually add more to it later, and I'm very sorry for the formatting; still figuring that out. TD;LR Gansey, Adam, Ronan go to Aglionby, Adam hangs out with them, Robert is pissed and Adam gets beat up (twice!! I'm so sorry.)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very, VERY, short chapter, I'm so sorry, I'll try and make the next one longer!

The next morning, Adam did not wait by the fence for Gansey. Gansey, upon discovering this, was very quickly filled with dread. Ronan sat silent in the back seat. Gansey did a cursory check for Robert Parrish’s truck before parking the Pig and exiting the vehicle.

“Stay here Ronan and _call me_ if you see a truck coming.” Ronan scoffed, for his hatred for mobile phones never waned, but he stayed. Gansey had been frigid towards him since yesterday’s incident, and he was as close to sheepish as Ronan Lynch was capable of being.

Gansey strode swiftly to the bungalow’s front door. He knocked raptly and repeatedly until the mousy woman he knew as Adam’s mother opened the door.

“Where is he?” he said simply.

“He doesn’t want visitors.”

“Mrs. Parrish.” Gansey sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “Where is he?” He asked again, calmly, with desperation disguised as authority. She wrung her hands but tilted her head ever so slightly in a direction that indicated behind the bungalow. Gansey walked away. He wasn’t sure if he hated or pitied her. Possibly both.

Walking around to the back, there were two possible locations for Adam to hide unless he had suddenly shrunk or turned invisible. He could either be under the dilapidated junk-car that permanently dwelt behind the Parrish residence, or he could be inside the tiny toolshed. Gansey checked quickly under the junk-car and then made his way to the shed.

He knocked, “Adam.” He called insistently, “Let me in.” He kept knocking, “If you don’t let me in, I’ll have Ronan kick the door down.” He insisted, “I’ll let him drag you to Monmouth and I’ll call the police myself.” He knew what he was saying was the ultimate betrayal, but he made the words sound like he meant it. He wasn’t sure he didn’t.

A moment later, the door scraped open a few inches. Gansey could tell that Adam was leaning heavily on both the door and the door frame, and his head was bowed so low that Gansey couldn’t see his face, only the top of his head, and the dusty, lank hair that hung down from it. Adam’s breathing was ragged,

“I told you not to park.” He said, which Gansey brushed off.

“He isn’t here. I checked. Ronan is my lookout right now.” Adam’s serrated laugh made Gansey wish he hadn’t heard it.

“Go to school Gansey and take Ronan with you. I’m fine, just won’t be making it in today.” Gansey didn’t know if Adam wasn’t bothering to conceal his accent, or if he couldn’t. He folded his arms, his feet staying planted. “…Please…” Adam’s slumped shoulders embodied his plea better than even his voice could manage “please Gansey.” Gansey was unhappy with how this day had begun.

“Just look at me before I go.”

“Only if you promise to go.” Well, that _certainly_ didn’t sit well with him, Gansey decided.

“How about this; I won’t go, _unless_ you look at me.” Adam’s entire frame was starting to shake, and Gansey suspected it was from standing. Or possibly anger. He rather hoped it was the latter.

Adam looked at him. Gansey’s heart stopped. Adam turned away and closed the door to the shed. Gansey stood there for three more minutes before he was able to convince his feet to uproot. It took further convincing to prevent his newly thawed limbs from ripping the door open again and personally drag Adam away from here. He paced for another two minutes before finally stomping back to the Pig. He slammed the door and Ronan gave him A Look. Gansey started the Pig and drove to Aglionby, one tiny, heartless corner of his brain wishing that he could erase the ghoulish, gory image in his head of Adam’s beaten face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TL;DR: Gansey and Ronan go to pick Adam up as usual and he isn't there. Gansey finds him in the toolshed, and after seeing his state ends up (reluctantly) leaving to go to Aglionby with Ronan.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all THANK YOU to everyone who's commented, given kudos, etc. I really appreciate it, and definitely never expect it! Sorry in advance for the lack of plot progression in this chapter, I'm still kind of figuring out where I want this to go, and I really need to work on my outline...I'm hoping it'll be less painful soon though? As always, please remember to check the tags, (I'm going to try and keep them updated to the best of my abilities,) stay safe, and just ask if you have questions. You can also message me over Tumblr if that's more convenient (@chaoticallyinclined) I do not own any of the characters, they belong to the lovely Maggie Stiefvater! See the end of chapter notes for TL;DR.

The next morning Adam sat on the side of the road, hands inside his hoodie pocket, while the hoodie itself did its best to ward off the ever more pervasive chill of fall. He wore his Aglionby uniform underneath. This was how Ronan learned exactly how bad the damage was. He had never seen Adam wear that hoodie. Adam would never willingly wear that hoodie near Aglionby. It was too large on him, faded, and had tiny holes in the elbows and pocket. It was blue. It positively ached of poverty. But despite all of that, Adam was swallowed inside of it. Which meant that today, something else was more worth hiding.

Gansey pulled the Pig up as close as he dared and checked for Robert Parrish’s car before he parked. Adam hadn’t stood up yet. Ronan wasn’t even sure if he knew they’d arrived. Gansey reached over from the driver’s side, leaning the passenger seat back until it was practically in Ronan’s lap, and then got out of the car.

“Adam?” Ronan could hear Gansey’s apprehension through the door of the Camaro. It was potent. Adam said something quietly that Ronan couldn’t hear and didn’t stand up. Gansey shot him a quick look through the side window that said _He’s got to be kidding._ Ronan’s eyebrows replied _Parrish is never fucking kidding._ He got out of the car. Together, he and Gansey hauled a lightly protesting Adam to his feet.

“What” Ronan began, “the _hell_ Parrish – “ he kept going; releasing a gratifyingly long list of curses that could apply to the situation. Gansey’s approach was subtler.

“Adam, can you even _walk?”_ Ronan looked at Gansey: the twist of his mouth spoke volumes.

Adam could walk. Barely. He stumbled more or less in the direction of the Pig, waving their hands away with a grunt. Ronan was left to examine the question of _how on God’s green earth did he manage to get up and to the side of the road at seven-thirty in the fucking morning?_ Gansey shadowed Adam’s steps all the way to the Camaro, neatly packing him into the passenger seat. He even did up the buckle, though Adam tried to swat him away. Ronan watched all of this, cursed some more, and then got into his own spot behind Adam. Silently, they drove towards Monmouth. There would be no Aglionby or Glendower today.

Adam stirred lightly when they passed by the school, looking like he was going to say something. Ronan chose that moment to lean forwards and prod at the radio. He turned up the volume to violent levels, and Gansey let him. Adam wilted slightly but kept quiet. Gansey told himself that this would be ok, he would fix it. Several times he contemplated turning around and heading straight to the nearest hospital. Betraying everything that Adam trusted and calling the police on the miscreation that was Robert Parrish. He didn’t.

Instead, he and Ronan carted Adam upstairs to Monmouth. Noah was there, looking on anxiously. Adam sat on Gansey’s bed in the middle of the room and didn’t speak. Though he did let out a dark-sounding chuckle. Personally, Gansey thought that was far more terrifying than either the small sounds of his pain or his silence.

“Adam?” Gansey stepped forwards and made to gently push the hood off of his face. For some reason, Adam allowed it. Ronan’s mind quickly catalogued what he saw there, tucking it away for future nightmares. Adam’s eyes were closed, his dusty hair askew. He laughed again, feeling the weight of their gaze, though nothing was funny. His mirth was enough to unnerve Noah, who disappeared into his room hastily.

“Well fuck.” Ronan surmised. Gansey couldn’t help but agree. Adam’s snickering continued, even as he blinked his eyes open, squinting up towards the ceiling. His face was a map of purple, blue, green and yellow continents. He couldn’t quite hide his wince as he leaned back onto his hands. Gansey had never been so close to calling 911 in his life. Ronan must have read it on his face because his eyes sliced down towards Gansey’s pocket, where he kept his phone. Gansey stepped forwards and pushed very lightly on Adam’s shoulder, a suggestion for him to lie down. Adam didn’t fight it, or maybe he couldn’t, Ronan thought. Another minute passed before his intermittent giggles had stopped. His eyes became sharper,

“Gansey. Ronan.” His voice was hoarse, “I can’t sit up.” Ronan was privately of the mind that this development meant there was finally something going right in the world. In his opinion Adam Parrish had no business sitting up. Gansey agreed. Not with words, but with hands placed on his hips and a furrow of his eyebrows. Neither of them moved to help Adam up.

Adam’s lips grimaced, and his brow creased, but he didn’t try to move on his own. His next questions were quick and cautious.

“Why did we come all the way to Monmouth? If we’re not going to Aglionby you could have left me – you didn’t – you –“ he stuttered to a halt, long fingers gripping at the mattress beneath him.

“We didn’t call anyone Adam.” Gansey sounded regretful. Adam looked relieved. Ronan wanted badly to punch something.

“Catch-up is going to be bitch.” Adam surmised. Ronan was suddenly struck by how much Adam _cared._ There were few things in his own life that Ronan still cared about; his friends, what was left of his family, obtaining his independence, but _Aglionby_ didn’t even rank among them.

“How…illustrative.” Gansey replied into the silence. Adam stayed silent for another long minute. Meanwhile Gansey tried to figure out what he should be doing, and Ronan tried to figure out what Gansey was doing. Or rather, why was he _not_ doing anything. Eventually his impatience won out, and he kicked savagely at the heels of Gansey’s boat shoes. Gansey looked up at him, “I _know_ Ronan!”

Together they looked back at Adam, who was still determinedly examining the ceiling, his mouth painted into an unhappy slant. “Okay…” Gansey rubbed the back of his neck “I’m going to take Noah out of here and go raid the nearest drugstore. Ronan, will you stay?” Ronan nodded tersely “Adam.” Gansey’s voice had an odd stone-like quality to it. “Try not to move.” He paused, “That sweater looks like it could use a wash.” He’d meant to say _it looks filthy,_ but polite upbringing won out.

Adam shook his head as adamantly as he was able, though it felt like his brain was doing somersaults inside his head.

“I’ll wash it later.” Gansey and Ronan exchanged a meaningful look. Gansey’s said _He’s hiding something._ Ronan’s said _Duh, I’m not an idiot._ Their conversation having concluded, Gansey called to Noah, and the two of them exited Monmouth silently.

Ronan turned back towards Adam, an ominous shadow over his eyes. “Just leave it alone Ronan.” Adam’s voice was a little breathless. His eyes held a warning. Ronan had never been much for heading warnings. He stared down at Adam, expression bleak.

“Like I don’t already know.”

Adam fought the urge to say, _You don’t._ Instead, he closed his eyes and tried to soothe the pounding in his head.

“Come on Parrish.”

Adam considered flipping him off. Instead he said, “It was an accident.” Ronan scoffed.

“And I’m Beatrice Fairfax.”

“Who?”

“Marie Manning.”

_“Who?”_

“I’m not going to call anyone.” Ronan said. He didn’t sound happy about it. Adam sighed, closing his eyes and bringing his hands up to rub them over his face. It hurt to lift his arms. And to touch his face. There was a long silence where neither of them moved, then Adam said,

“Help me up.” Ronan clasped his arm and pulled him upright while Adam grimaced. He managed to get the sweater over his head until it was dangling on his arms. Impatient, Ronan tugged it the rest of the way off, leaving Adam sitting on the edge of Gansey’s bed, now sans hoodie, but still wearing his rumpled uniform. There was a large stain on the side of the sweater.

“You can borrow a shirt,” Ronan said pointedly. Adam hesitated a moment longer, then sloughed off the raven-breasted sweater and didn’t look at Ronan.

Now that he could see Adam’s uncovered torso, Ronan’s thoughts turned towards violence again. He deliberated over whether punching the wall or throwing something out the window would be more cathartic. The bruises on Adam’s ribs were deep and squishy-looking, and there was some nasty blistering along the left side of his torso. His skin was slightly goose-pimpled from the cold.

“What is _that_ from?” Ronan asked, wrinkling his nose at the burn. Adam was wishing desperately for his sweater back, and also for the strength to stand and shove Ronan onto his ass. He didn’t reply. Ronan remembered; _an accident._ He waited less than a second before stomping off with the clothes twisted in his hands. Adam heard the distinctive slam of a washer door. He ached everywhere. His bruises felt like pulverized meat. Breathing too deeply hurt, and his ribs felt sharp inside him. The air was scratchy against his skin.

Ronan came back with a fresh t-shirt in hand, and Adam wasted no time snatching it from him. He had yet to lie back down. He might need help to sit back up again and wasn’t anxious to compromise his already limited autonomy.

Minutes passed in silence, watching dust motes float through the air. Monmouth was quiet, yawning in the early light of the day. The sunlight seemed to fall dully on Ronan, like even mother nature didn’t dare brighten his shadowy demeanor. He was made of bold, inky outlines and his sharpness did not match the soft t-shirt he had given Adam, or the fuzziness inside Adam’s head.

They didn’t have long to wait. The Pig was audible, even from inside Monmouth, and Gansey’s steps were too quick on the stairs to be stealthy. Noah wasn’t audible, trailing behind him, but that wasn’t surprising.

There was a jingle of keys and then Gansey tumbled into the room, a white plastic bag with a drugstore logo on it swinging off his arm.

“I thought you said _raid,”_ Ronan interjected, looking skeptically at the single bag. Adam was quietly grateful, until Ronan continued, “did you get my text?” Gansey looked surprised.

“No.” It was clear from his expression that he hadn’t even thought to check his phone. Ronan never texted. Adam couldn’t remember even seeing him on his phone while Gansey had been gone.

Ronan frowned, “you’ll have to go back then – Parrish has some kind of burn.” He didn’t shy away from Adam’s glare when he spoke, and Adam fought hard not to snap back as all eyes turned towards him.

“Damn,” Gansey said, without heat. “What from?” Ronan shrugged while Adam continued to glower.

“How bad is it?” Gansey asked Adam directly this time. “First, second?” Adam grit his teeth,

“Second.” He eventually ground out.

“Well shit Parrish.”

Gansey dropped the plastic bag onto the bed beside Adam before turning back towards the door. “Noah, are you coming?” He asked briskly. Noah was staring between Ronan and Adam. He visibly swallowed before nodding, following Gansey back out.

Ronan examined the contents of the bag Gansey had left behind. There were a couple of ice packs, which caused him to disappear briefly into the bathroom/kitchen. Adam heard the freezer door open and shut. There were also two bottles of pain medication. The label on one of them read: _Extra Strength!!_ Adam took one, then rooted through the bag to find the receipt. It was there, crumpled up at the bottom. He pocketed it for later.

Ronan amused himself by wandering around Monmouth, slamming doors and being generally disruptive like an aggravated ghoul. It did nothing to help Adam’s headache, but the pain medication did, eventually. Once, when Ronan had vanished into another room, Adam lifted his borrowed shirt to look at the blistering, light pink and raw. He could still feel the sensation of hot liquid pouring over his side. He didn’t think his Father had meant to knock the pot of soup off the stove, but then he was never sure what his Father meant to do. All things said and done; it definitely could have been worse. There was blistering, yes, but most of the skin just looked angry. _It was an accident._

It didn’t take long for Gansey and Noah to return, and Gansey again dropped the bag beside Adam on the bed. Adam found the second receipt when he wasn’t looking and stowed it away with the first.

“Are we going to talk about this?”

Adam ground his teeth together. Gansey wrung his hands.

“You could live here,” Gansey said, and it sounded like an age-old adage, “or somewhere else – _anywhere_ else.” Adam tried to breathe,

“I am going to leave,” He said quietly, “on my own terms.” Gansey started to pace,

“Why can’t that be _now?”_ He was upset, “I don’t understand.”

“No, you don’t.” Adam replied, “I don’t want to have this conversation again.”

_“Conversation,”_ Gansey blew out, under his breath. “Can’t you see how serious this is?”

“I’m _fine,”_ Adam snapped, “and I don’t want your pity.” Gansey sagged, his shoulders deflating.

“I don’t pity you.” He said, “I _care_ about you.” Adam didn’t know what to say to that, but Gansey wasn’t done, “And I don’t want one of my best friends to become the headline of some news-article. _Please_ Adam, what are you waiting for?”

“I’ve told you.” Adam chewed out, “just drop it, Gansey.”

A million more words flew through Gansey’s head. _Why should I? What about this, exactly, is ‘fine?’ Are you really so blind? Proud?_ He held back the tide, hands clenching into fists at his side. He thought, maybe, he could understand Ronan a little better right now. He thought about what he _should_ do. He thought about picking up the phone, Adam’s wishes – his _pride –_ be damned. He thought about doing everything he knew Adam didn’t want him to do. In the end, he was still too afraid. That it wouldn’t work. That Adam would hate him for it. That he would lose his friend, along with any chance he had to help. He knew Adam didn’t want his help, but he still wanted to be there if he needed it. He let out a long breath. “So, what now?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! TD;LR: Ronan and Gansey take an injured Adam back to Monmouth, (skipping Aglionby) and attempt to help him. Adam is frustratingly stubborn, as per usual.


	4. Chapter 4

Hi all! So sorry, I know I said I would update, but my life has been thrown into upheaval once again. I'm going to put this fic on (temporary!!) hiatus until I can figure things out, but I'm hoping that it won't be for too long. I WILL FINISH IT, things are just crazy right now. <3 Ok, that's that.

I also wanted to say a huge THANK YOU to every lovely soul who's left comments and kudos! I never expected this fic to get so much attention, and I really appreciate all the kind words and thoughts. <3


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